The Idyllicist

Studying wisdom of the past to build a better future

  • In Memoriam

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    “Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled: ‘Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?’” – 1 Corinthians 15:54-55

    It was eight years ago last Thursday that my closest friend, Adam, died unexpectedly. He was fourteen years old. I thought it fitting to write this post based on a verse he wrote a Bible study around – a study on death, just one month before his passing. 

    This time of year is a very reflective one for me. The hole that death leaves is one that never fills back up. But for those who do believe in an afterlife, it can feel quite silly after enough thought. After all, if you know you will see someone again, why miss them more than you would if they were just on an extended vacation?

    There is something so seemingly final about death. And this is not to understate death – there is a finality to it that is very real. Even for those who do believe in an afterlife, even though the soul remains intact, there is something about this world that clings to the physical. 

    Entire religions and systems of thought have been predicated on rejecting the physical. Even some early Christians did this. But wholesale rejecting the physical is, in my opinion, a disservice to the gift that is life. While I do believe life is everlasting, the life we live in these tangible bodies is very much finite – and, in the grand scheme of things, infinitely short. 

    I did not gain a full appreciation for this life until two things occurred. The first was Adam’s death, which caused me to think incessantly of my own mortality. The second was leaving the church. 

    The church places much emphasis on restraining one’s experience and exploration of the physical in the name of “purity.” Sex is a good example of this. While there is such thing as too much, a belief system that restrains its believers for no other reason than the “glory of God” is denying them their literally once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to experience this life as it ought to be experienced. 

    My point is that this life is all we know of for certain. While I am certain my soul will persist after my death, I cannot know until I experience it myself. There is that Great Veil that, with very little exception, cannot be parted or peered through in any objective manner. And that uncertainty alone is exceedingly difficult to come to terms with. 

    It is this uncertainty and finality that, in my opinion, lends that sting to death that would be inhuman not to feel. There is a real, tangible loss in this plane when someone passes on, even if they continue to exist elsewhere. 

    For that reason, I, personally, would prefer a proper funeral over a celebration of life when my time comes. Surely there is much to celebrate about life, but there is plenty of time to celebrate life. Death typically happens only once. To each their own, of course, but there is an undeniable solemnity surrounding death and funerary rites to which I aim to afford due respect. 

    One must imagine that the senses are amplified in the afterlife, and that the eternal existence that awaits is one our physical bodies cannot presently fathom. Perhaps, then, the time just after death is disorienting at best. Perhaps the recently-deceased soul is like a newborn being pulled from the womb. 

    What follows, then, is that the experience of life in the afterlife is orders of magnitude more vibrant and intimate than this one, and that is something to look forward to. But until then, this life is what we have, so it is of the utmost importance both to take care of what we have and to enjoy it. 

  • Choose Your Afterlife

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    “Never was there a time when I did not exist, or you, or these kings; nor will there come a time when we cease to be.” – Bhagavad Gita 2.12

    Nearly every religion has some concept of the soul, and the dominant religions of this day put forth that the soul does not cease to exist after it is born. I believe this as well – for the most part. 

    There are a handful of tenets I hold that have come to define my spirituality, and one of those I have called everfith, the belief in the everlasting nature of the soul. 

    I do think every soul, whether human or otherwise, has the potential and inclination to persist in eternity. And I believe that those who do good with their lives, or at the very least do no harm, do walk this path. 

    But sin, however one defines that word, is an all-consuming disease of the soul. To me, sin manifests as “treason to the soul,” a disregard of the rights of others. The symptoms of this disease are greed and selfishness, hatred and extreme, incurable envy. And the longer one lets these symptoms fester, the more they succumb to the disease. 

    Especially in this day and age, I want to emphasize that aspects of personal identity – sexuality and gender identity among them – are not only a beautiful part of every soul, but something to be celebrated. Any movement that demonizes this threatens its own humanity. 

    It is my belief that the arc of Time does bend toward morality, even if slowly, and that that necessitates the eventual end of sin. As I have written before, I do not believe sin is something arbitrary imposed by a higher power, but a choice that an individual makes. This choice is simple: look outward, or look inward. 

    And it is my belief that this is the choice that determines one’s eternity – not allegiance to a certain deity, not the correct ritual or theology, but an acknowledgement and active celebration of our common humanity and our place in this universe. Those who act morally and lead upright lives have eternity to spend in bliss, but those who put down others for their own gain become so consumed by their own greed and selfishness that it devours their soul. 

    I also do not think of death as the last chance to make this decision. Any moral existence, in my opinion, must present each soul a second chance and an opportunity to improve. Thus it is my belief that there are millions out there, if not even billions, who have not yet sealed their fates even centuries after their passing.  Perhaps they lived in opposition to good during their time in this life, but are making a genuine and concerted attempt at improving themselves in the next life. I think that is something to be celebrated. 

    If souls have no end, what of their beginnings? I do not subscribe to the idea that souls have no beginning – if anything, the birth of a soul is somewhat fuzzy. I also do not believe in reincarnation, for the most part, but it is reasonable to think of the passing on of genetic code as a partial reincarnation. In this way, every soul has a foundation upon which to build before they enter this world, but they do not properly experience life until they are brought about. 

    When one thinks of this, the idea that the beginnings of each and every one of our souls were milling about in an impossibly intertwined manner, is it not easy to begin to view your fellow humans as the family they are? 

    I recognize that ideas like these are unfalsifiable and entirely subjective. All of religion is. What I believe validates subscribing to unfalsifiable ideas is their result in the real world. Perhaps the soul is truly a projection of chemical reactions, and perhaps there is no such thing as the divine. But if belief in such things moves humanity along the arrow of progress, so long as an acknowledgement of the differences between faith and science exists, then it is an ultimate benefit to humanity. 

    That said, I do believe in souls and their everlasting nature. Even between wildly different subjective experiences across thousands of different cultures and billions of individuals, there must be some truth to the idea. What is written previously is my best approximation of the nature of this world we cannot readily interact with.

  • Those in the Ground

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    “Because the Earth, as all men know, is not just the All-Mother, but the common graveyard too.” – The Nature of Things 5.257-258

    I have been conducting research on my own family history for the last thirteen years, and it always amazes me the endless amount of knowledge to be gained. What is often easy to forget, however, is that each name on a gravestone, each line in a parish record, and each name in a census are individuals who lived entire lives ahead of ours, complete with their own friends, family, and loved ones. 

    This most recent round of research resulted in my being able to push back my patrilineal line – that of the Hembrough family – to my tenth-great-grandfather. The single earliest record I have found for this particular line was written more than four hundred years ago, recording the 1621 baptism of Margaret Hembrough, the daughter of Thomas. Her brother Thomas, my ninth-great-grandfather, was born the following year. 

    These records come from parish records kept at Selby Abbey in Yorkshire, England. I understand it was one of the more notable religious institutions in the area at the time. Most parish records are divided into christenings, marriages, and burials, and these are invaluable resources for anyone looking to learn about who they came from. 

    It is these burials that strike me. Of course, death is part of life, so perhaps it is ridiculous to be so struck by these records, but each line represents the end of an entire life unknowable to us but for anything that happened to be written down. 

    Affording the humanity that each ancestor deserves can be difficult when so little remains, but some meditation on one’s own family history can bring this into clearer focus. 

    My sixth-great-grandfather, Richard Hembrough, may be the oldest subject of my research that gave me significant pause. He and his wife, Mary, were the parents of twelve children. As was unfortunately quite normal in those days, not all of them survived. 

    Richard and Mary were married in 1773. In fact, I have in my possession a copy of their marriage license, complete with both of their signatures, indicating they both were literate. They had their first daughter, Elizabeth, later that year. Their son Richard was born in 1774, but died just three months later. Around this time, recordkeepers began writing down more information – including cause of death. 

    Their daughter Jane lived only two months before dying of “looseness” in 1780, and their son Matthew died the next year after just one month of life to “diarrhea.” The next daughter, Sarah, was just seven months old when she succumbed to smallpox. 

    Sarah’s death was the one that made me pause. Most of us likely have family that died of smallpox, a horrifically disfiguring disease that killed one of every three people it infected. Thanks entirely to the science of vaccines, none of Earth’s eight billion people need worry about smallpox. But for our ancestors, it was a constant looming specter. 

    Smallpox was also highly contagious and spread easily between people. Some unlucky families were mostly or entirely wiped out by it in a relatively short period of time. 

    By 1783, the family of Richard and Mary Hembrough consisted of five living children. Four had already died. The oldest living child was just seven years old when her baby sister developed smallpox – old enough to at least partially comprehend the gravity of a situation like that. Smallpox was not subtle, either, and it often left its surviving victims with scars all over the body. 

    Sarah was the only one of the family who died to this outbreak, but it is extremely likely that others in the family also developed this disease at the same time. Those who were spared were forced to watch their loved ones suffer through a horrible sickness, not knowing if they would live to see another day. 

    There were two more deaths in the years after Sarah’s: Mary, the third child, made it to the age of eighteen before dying of “cholic,” and Mary, the wife and mother, died in 1809 of consumption, another relatively common yet devastating disease. Today, it is known as tuberculosis. 

    Obviously, Richard Hembrough did have some children make it to adulthood. I would not be here otherwise. But it is important to remember that these people were just as real as we who are still alive are. They had loves and fears, friends and enemies, and wins and losses. It boggles the mind to think of just how precisely history had to line up to produce any one of us. And yet, here we are. 

    The preciousness of life cannot be understated. As we share the Earth with those alive today, we all will eventually share the Earth with those who have already passed on. I do believe in an afterlife, and perhaps I will write on that soon, but no expected reward or punishment in the next life should discount the worth of this life. It is, in my opinion, one of the highest acts of veneration to live one’s life to the fullest – and to help and encourage others to do the same. 

  • The Song of Wedlock

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    Note from the Author: Last Friday, I got married to the love of my life. I had no free time to write a post, so in lieu of that, I will be sharing the poetry I wrote to be recited at the wedding.

    ~~~

    Here intertwine two souls forever.

    The love that thrives within this couple
    We task to stand the test of all Time,
    The sacred bond forged eternally.

    The love that lives within this couple
    We task to survive the crests and troughs
    Of the wave that is this marriage bond.

    The love that envelops this couple
    We task to protect and to keep close
    The souls we shall witness become one.

    Here, you are safe, and here, you are loved.
    Here, no outside force can penetrate
    These walls which you have built together.

    You are the strongest city of all.
    The great rulers of antiquity
    Tremble before your strength and resolve.

    You are the sturdiest house of all.
    The family you begin today
    Shall rest well in the peace you will bring.

    The rings which wrap around your fingers
    Mean much more than meets the mortal eye.
    They are maps that stretch on forever.

    The ring represents the endless love
    Its wearer shows towards their other,
    The righteous path they walk forever.

    Let the love that lives in this one heart
    Survive, thrive, and continue to grow
    Forever, for all eternity.

    Let us ensure this bond will not break

    The bond of marriage must be sturdy,
    For this love is the culmination
    Of life and all existence itself.

    Both partners must be fully equal,
    For neither should absorb the other,
    But both should unite as a couple.

    On both rest responsibility
    To keep and maintain this sacred bond
    For all eternity, through all Time.

    Marriage is not for the faint of heart.
    Marriage is not for the fickle, and
    Marriage is not for the impatient.

    Marriage is not for the wanderers.
    Marriage is not for the cheaters, and
    Marriage is not for the unfocused.

    Marriage is not for the self-absorbed.
    Marriage is not for the angry, and
    Marriage is not for the inward eyes.

    Those who wish to marry each other
    Must beat with one heart, bleed from one vein,
    Breathe from one lung, and hurt from one nerve.

    Those who wish to marry each other
    Must speak with one voice, plan with one draft,
    Weigh with one tool, and build with one hand.

    Those who wish to marry each other
    Must paint with one brush, write with one pen,
    Think with one brain, and dream with one mind.

    These conditions have and will be met.

    As the Earth and Moon are kindred souls,
    So, too, are these two before us now
    Who gaze into the wells of their eyes.

    Bound together for eternity,
    These two engage in a cosmic dance
    That nothing could ever dream to halt.

    It is for each other they exist.
    The love present here and now forever
    Is a wonder of the universe.

    As the Earth and Moon are spectacles
    Both in their own right and on their own,
    So, too, are these two before us now.

    But, as the Earth and Moon so depend
    On each one to keep this sacred bond,
    So, too, do these two before us now.

    They are an icon and masterpiece,
    Both perfectly complementary
    To their other half in each manner.

    As the Earth and Moon spin on in Time,
    They affirm their relation each day,
    The holiest ritual of all.

    In their eternal orbit around
    Each other, let this couple know joy
    Unfathomable, except to them.

    The wondrous spiral of love around
    Grows each and every passing second.
    Let it live, forever and always.

    Let these two before us become one.

  • Worship and Wisdom

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    “Better than any ritual is the worship achieved through wisdom; wisdom is the final goal of every action, Arjuna.” – Bhagavad Gita 4.33

    Wisdom is the pinnacle of existence, in my opinion. This is not intelligence, nor is it hard study or simple recall, but a general and overarching wherewithal of existence and reality. 

    The word itself, in English, remains relatively unchanged over the past millennium. Stretching further back in time, “wisdom” derives from an ancestral root meaning “to see.” In my own system of belief, this vastness of meaning is captured in the word “wit,” which also is a member of this etymologic family. 

    Wisdom is a true, pure, raw understanding of what it means to exist, not just to be alive, but to live. Consciousness is a truly awe-inspiring force, and one I do not believe will ever be fully explained by science. Even more wonderful than consciousness is the interaction between their multitude. 

    We will certainly revisit this concept in the future, but I wish to expand on one specific idea in this segment. To be wise, to see and understand, necessitates an innate propensity for curiosity and, more importantly, questioning. 

    Thus we arrive at one of several major departures from my prior beliefs: that worship is not, in fact, the purpose of our existence. If anything, worship may be called antithetical to purpose. 

    The word itself is descendant of the suggestion that worth may only be attained through such an action – that is, discarding the self as worthless and attributing all good things to another being. While this makes perfect sense in the Christian framework, the time is nigh to challenge it. 

    There is an argument that religion came about simply as a means of control. I disagree with this notion, but it is impossible to disagree with the fact that many throughout history have wielded religion in such a manner. And in this has mass devastation been effected. 

    In prior years, I would have dismissed this notion with the idea that God is worthy of worship and blind, undying devotion. But I cannot in good conscience preach that today with the knowledge I have of religion. It is not that there is simply a lack of evidence for the Christian framework – that alone can be covered by faith. But there is evidence against the Christian framework that cannot be ignored. 

    I do believe in God, but not as portrayed in the Bible, or in any other text. God by definition must be so utterly transcendent that his entirety cannot be grasped. Even my own writings and ideas can only amount to an approximation of my concept of the divine. 

    Such an awe-inspiring thing is worthy of veneration, yes, but not worship. Wisdom, then, may be the ability to admit one’s limits, but stand firm in what is known to be true. 

    If that is not the ultimate act of respect and veneration of the ultimate source of consciousness, then nothing is. 

  • Perseverance is an Obligation

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    “Does the light of the lamp shine without losing its splendor until it is extinguished; and shall the truth which is in thee and justice and temperance be extinguished [before thy death]?” – Meditations 12.15

    At the beginning of my current journal, I wrote, “Perseverance is an obligation.” I tried to find words that would reflect what I believed the overall mood of the journal to be, and I quickly found that it was applicable to much more than just that journal. 

    Perseverance, to me, is one of the most respectable attributes a person may have. Perseverance in the face of evil or misfortune, especially, commands great regard. 

    The first person who comes to mind when I think of perseverance is my partner – and soon-to-be wife. She was born with a rotten hand in a rotten land, was forced to live on next to nothing, and was the undeserving object of her mother’s ire. 

    And she is still here – and thriving. 

    It truly makes me proud to see who she has become and is still becoming. We have known each other for four years and been together for three and a half, and the respect and admiration I feel for her grows every day. It continually amazes me that, despite our very different upbringings, we converged on the same values and goals. And this is because she persevered and made the most of a bad start. 

    Similarly, we all must strive to persevere in the face of the evil and injustice spewing forth from the world’s current authorities. I am fortunate enough to live in an area unaffected by these spurious wars, and it is not lost on me that, especially in these days, that is a mark of privilege. 

    Thus, I feel that resistance and perseverance is even more necessary on the part of all those who share that privilege. It is human nature to become fatigued – I certainly have had my moments of exhaustion – but it is also human nature to persist against all odds. 

    There are innumerable examples throughout history of the undying human spirit, and more examples emerge with each passing day. 

    We are living in the history books, so to speak, and our stories will be told for generations to come. Be on the right side of history. 

  • The Wrong Tree

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    “For many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah,’ and will deceive many.” – Matthew 24:4

    For how little the Bible actually discusses the Antichrist, there certainly is much discourse about this figure in modern evangelical Christianity. What goes unacknowledged, however, is that the Bible often discusses multiple antichrists instead of a particular figure. 

    An antichrist is simply a person who embodies the opposite of Jesus and his teachings. Jesus taught love and care, empathy and compassion. So an antichrist must reasonably be a hateful, greedy, malignant narcissist, or something to that effect. 

    Like the Book of Revelation, the idea of the Antichrist is a distilled symbol of a much more pervasive issue throughout human history – that of the greedy. People like this rise to the top of society often, and it seems the world is never quite free from selfish men attempting to bend the arc of the universe to their will. 

    Distilling such a pervasive issue into a neatly-packaged symbol is a convenient and effective way to communicate a message. However, over the last two thousand years, that message has become unrecognizable. An antichrist is no longer any figure who acts contrary to the teachings of Jesus, but a particular figure who will usher in the end of days. This strain of thought has been present since the writing of the New Testament itself, but it is more or less the sole perspective now. 

    And while I do not subscribe to the idea of an end of days, I must say it is quite remarkable how similar the current leader of this country is to the figure illustrated in the Book of Revelation. 

    This is not because of some divine prophecy, but the simple fact that all selfish men, and especially selfish leaders, sing the same song. When the ego takes charge, there are only so many ways a person in power may act. 

    Let us pretend for a moment that this leader – and it is obvious who I speak of – is the modern evangelical notion of ‘the Antichrist.’ What then?

    The issue is that so many reject this Antichrist not because of his many, many heinous acts and utter disdain for humanity, but simply because he thinks of himself as higher than their deity of choice. This is a massive problem, one that reflects a commitment to obedience rather than one to any actual sense of morality. 

    As I have posited previously, a religion that prioritizes obedience over morality is not a framework for betterment. It is a framework for control. The result of this is painfully obvious: millions in this country are magnitudes more offended by a simple picture than they are over the death and destruction this figure gleefully leaves in his wake. 

    Let me repeat: this figure has blood on his hands. But for the group of people who believe themselves to be the epitome of morality, the one act that has shaken their faith in this figure is his choice to depict himself as a deity. It is not even his narcissism, but the simple fact that he depicted himself as their god. 

    Finding the proper words for the feelings of revulsion I have over this disingenuous virtue signalling is difficult. There are many thoughts I wish to put on paper, but these must suffice. 

    Do not allow one questionable act to outshine the utter depravity of people like those in power today. More importantly, do not allow those who criticize this singular act to pretend they are any more moral than others if they so happily turn a blind eye to the plain-sight death and destruction people like this wield.

  • Finding Our Niche

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    “Better to have wisdom than weapons of war, but one sinner can destroy much that is good.” – Ecclesiastes 9:18

    There is a concept in ecology known as the niche, a space in which a population can specialize and adapt to thrive in a specific part of an environment. In evolutionary biology is a concept known as competition, in which a population that wants to succeed must possess certain attributes that place it in the best position to persist. 

    For any person who lends credence to the opinions of others, these attributes are not ones that one should strive to associate with. In nature, the most successful species are competitive – they are selfish, greedy, paranoid, and act before they think. As products of evolution, these attributes are among the most base states of human nature. 

    So, if we are products of evolution, what separates humanity from the rest of the natural world? It cannot be language, culture, religion, or consciousness. Other animals have these things. I do not believe that the soul is unique to humans either. 

    Those who are eager to separate our species from its origins point to acts of selflessness. But it cannot be altruism or empathy that distinguishes us from our relatives. They demonstrate these attributes as well. 

    And this is the great paradox of evolution – that altruism is able to be rewarded. If a species must be competitive and selfish to prevail and persist, how can an altruistic species possibly survive? 

    I believe attributes like altruism and empathy are indicators that a population has begun to move past its wild crib into a more refined adulthood. And rather than losing its grip on its niche, the population grows into the niche in a way it could not before. 

    Selfishness, greed, and competition can only help a species so much. Once wholly dominant, a selfish and competitive population must turn inward to continue in the same mentality, and this becomes self-destructive very, very quickly. It is also obvious that a greedy species that has dominated its natural niche can do immense harm to its environment, thus destroying the very thing it adapted to. 

    Humanity has yet to truly grow into its spiritual niche, and it will take mass empathy before this occurs. As I have said before, I want to believe that everyone is capable of empathy. However, my interactions with people make acceptance of such a radical idea next to impossible. 

    But, once this does happen and regression is put to the wayside, humanity will be able to thrive in a way no other species has in the past. But this requires wisdom, not weapons.

  • Sleep On It

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    “Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.” – Psalm 4:4

    This is among the most sound advice I have ever received from my father. I do not know if he got it from this verse or from life experience, but it has been instrumental in acting rationally in emotionally-charged situations. Unfortunately, not everyone sees this as a good thing. 

    First, I have some misgivings about the Bible’s definition of “sin,” but I would agree that acting in anger could constitute sin. I once wrote that sin is “treason to the soul,” and “projection of one’s own faults to the blameless soul of another.” Acting in anger and allowing it to control oneself would fall under this definition. 

    I have found myself in many an instance where the temptation to act irrationally, and out of anger, was palpable. Of course, there have been times I did snap and said something I regretted later. However, as I have gotten older and been presented with more of these stressful situations, it has become increasingly apparent that waiting to act and allowing anger to simmer down is nearly always the correct course of action. 

    The first time I encountered resistance to this method was in a management role two and a half years ago. An employee had overstepped his authority on multiple occasions, and I decided a disciplinary action was necessary. This was someone I had had a very close friendship with and even lived with up until this point, so I waited a few days to discuss the action to allow both of us time to think through the situation. 

    I should note that the disciplinary action should not have been a surprise – this employee knew very well that he had overstepped his bounds, and he knew the consequences. 

    When we did discuss it, his anger had not abated. If anything, it grew, and before I had a chance to explain the reason for my actions, he told me that nothing I could say or do would restore our friendship. We agreed that we could no longer live together, and I no longer felt safe in our apartment, so I moved all of my belongings to my car, fully at peace with the idea that I would be living in my car for the next several months. Were it not for my fiancée’s father offering me a place to stay, this would have been my reality.  

    He also told me he would rather have had me berate him in the moment than have a collected conversation later on, and knowing the self-benefit of refraining from acting in anger, I felt more pity and confusion than anything else in that moment. 

    Two and a half years later, I still do not regret the manner in which I handled that situation, or any of those that followed in the ensuing months. And this may be the most important lesson of all from this story – that even if acting in line with one’s moral compass leads to material or social ruin, this is far better than compromising one’s moral code and maintaining that status. 

    To trade conscience for gain is to lose humanity. 

  • The Truth Hurts

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    “And confound not truth with falsehood nor hide truth knowingly.” – Surah 2:43

    Oftentimes, one of the hardest things to do is tell the truth. Many find it easier and more convenient to lie, or “fib” as some say. But each and every lie entangles one in a growing web. 

    I was fortunate growing up to have a father who recognized the importance of honesty. In all of my twenty-two years, I cannot think of a single instance in which my father lied to me. The effect of this is that I, too, highly value the truth – even when it is uncomfortable. 

    In my capacity as an editor, I am often tasked with revealing the truth after it has been covered by bad actors. This, of course, ruffles some feathers, and my commitment to the truth has made me some bitter enemies. But bending reality to anyone’s whim is a dangerous idea, even for the smallest of lies. 

    One who controls truth also controls reality, which is why it is so paramount that the truth remain unfettered and free. Truth simply is reality, and any attempt to dishonestly control a narrative is an affront to all. 

    Truly it is impressive how quickly some cast off the truth and don a convenient falsehood. Human nature is naturally self-serving – this is just the way of evolution – but we must rise above these impulses if we are to build a society where opportunity and peace are truly accessible to all. 

    Those consumed with greed are drawn to obscuring the truth and portraying reality in their own twisted manner. Even when these people have everything, however, their greed is never sated. Even in the darkest of times, the constant pursuit of control drives the greedy mad. And the best way to rid oneself of this affliction is to be honest and transparent. Mistakes happen, and wrongs will be done, but a prompt and genuine acknowledgement of wrongdoing goes a long way, both for oneself and for others. 

    Even if it sets you back for now, the truth will always set you free eventually.